Most brides who have shopped venue pricing with an eye to reducing the expense of their weddings in these tighter-than-usual monetary times, have discovered to their disappointment that the only way they could afford the venue they’d really like, would be if they were willing to have a wedding brunch instead of a dinner (followed by a drink-and-dance-‘til-you-drop reception). And that just stops them in their tracks. Because–why? Nighttime is more sophisticated? More formal? More romantic? Candlelight doesn’t show up the daylight? Because all your friends have had big party-down receptions?
Well, balderdash to all your excuses! A late-morning wedding is an extremely elegant choice, and particularly if everybody you know has partied into the wee hours at their own receptions–do you want your wedding a cookie-cutter version of theirs but in different colors?
There are so many advantages to a wedding with a brunch reception that when you really think about it, why haven’t you considered it more seriously before?
Less sophisticated? From Queen Victoria’s age until the past 30-odd years, most western-culture weddings were actually early-day functions, often celebrated in the family’s church, with a meal and some merry-making afterward. True, for the moneyed class, the company may have reconvened later that evening in the ballroom of someone’s palace for a reception-ball–which, with the 1980s’ emphasis on materialism, made a big comeback for the middle class, paid for with plastic, wrapped in excess and amped-up with the era of D.J.’s and disco music rocking into marathon parties as soon as the “formalities” of the wedding were out of the way–and this, or a variation of it, has become the new “standard.” But while everyone hopes for the “merry-making” aspect of friends and family celebrating their union, is there anything inherently elegant or sophisticated (or even dignified?) about your wedding turning into a club as soon as the cake has been cut?
Less formal? No. The bride still wears the gown of her choice, full length or, if it suits her, an elegant tea-length. Traditional morning attire for the groom and groomsmen calls for tailcoats, vests, and gray-striped trousers–not seen that much anymore, and ultra-formal. Bridesmaids may wear long dresses (but perhaps nothing so full-blown as a ball gown) or tea- or knee-length dresses, to which there has been more of shift in recent years even at evening weddings. Perhaps it’s somewhat less formal for the guests, in that the ladies will wear “dressy” rather than “evening” attire, but that just means less angst for your guests. Or perhaps you’re a less-formal kind of couple anyway, and prefer a simpler and/or shorter gown, with the men in dark suits instead of tuxedos? A wedding brunch works for this, too.
Less romantic? Isn’t there a freshness to morning light and dew on the grass, that is sacred to that time of day–the very same “new beginning” that you as a couple are showing the world in your wedding finery and your vows this day, amidst your dewy flowers? Have you listened to the melody of Cat Stevens’ Morning Has Broken and not thought, I would love that to be played at my wedding? There is just something special about the early day–unspoiled, before the world starts going about its business, that makes this time of day unique–private hours to be cherished.
You always wanted a candlelight ceremony. So have one. As long as it’s indoors, tall tapers will glow regally, and tealights and votives will twinkle magically around your centerpieces, on lovely classic table linens for which you will NOT have to pay a premium rental price because they aren’t the “custom” taffetas and beaded sheers, etc., that are most suitable for evening.
Will it cut your time short? Yes. Overall, your event will be shorter. This may work best for you anyway if there will be lots of children, who can only last so long. The only portion of the reception that is really cut down is the drinking and dancing time. How to make it work for you/even save a little more money? Evening weddings usually mean you’re going to book a room at a special, local hotel, for the occasion of your wedding night, especially if you’re leaving the next day for your honeymoon. This means an extra night’s pretty-expensive lodging (where you may spend only 5 or 6 hours of being too wired to sleep, instead of being able to kick back and enjoy yourselves, before you head off to the airport or cruise ship), with complex arrangements with the hotel for the bride’s gown and accessories to be picked up and the groom’s tuxedo to be returned to the rental shop on time. A wedding brunch allows you the photo-opportunity of piling into your escape vehicle still in your wedding finery in broad daylight, then being dropped off at a friend’s house–where you’ll change into your travel clothes, drop off the tux to be returned and the wedding dress to be picked up later, and you can get a jump on your honeymoon by taking a late afternoon or evening flight out instead of waiting for the next day.
So you can save on the venue. You can save on table linen rentals. You can skip a wasted night at your local 5-star hotel. What else can you save on? Let’s see:
Alcohol and bar expenses: the majority of people don’t want Scotch on the rocks at 11 am.–so stocking a bar is not required, and probably no bartender*. This doesn’t mean your celebration has to be a tee-totaling marathon of awkward small-talk. Alcohol can still be served–poured champagne; and early-day punches (like Mimosa or Pomegranate Mimosa) are SO elegant at brunches. (Or any other punch that you favor–just take care that it’s not too high in alcohol content, as punches are easy to drink, therefore notoriously easy to drink too much.) And/or, chilled pitchers of Screwdrivers or Bloody Mary’s, a perennial early-day favorite (with Tabasco on the side). You might line up a handful of friends/relatives to pour champagne (especially at toast time), to preside over the “spiked” punch bowl (to keep it replenished and children out), and to make Bloody Mary’s (just get a mix and cut up a supply of tall slim celery sticks for garnish) and Screwdrivers. Setting out several pitchers of Bloody Mary’s and Screwdrivers in one location–perhaps on large trays–will limit the inevitable colorful drippage to that one spot rather than having them poured at/on the dining tables. But if glassware (as opposed to the many choices of plasticware now available) is important to you, DO rent sufficient champagne flutes, punch cups, and highball glasses (for the Scredrivers and Bloody Mary’s). NOTE: You’ll want to provide a non-alcoholic punch for children and those who prefer no alcohol. It’s wisest to serve the children in plastic party glasses rather than glass punch cups. * You will still be required to obtain a “banquet license” for service of alcohol, but you will not have to stock a full bar, mixers and soft drinks, wines (other than the champagne) or beer. Some states or particular venues may require a licensed bartender to oversee the dispensing of any alcohol whatsoever, sorry.
D.J. and Music: It’s debatable whether you will need a D.J. for a wedding brunch. If you have a father, brother or friend who’s willing to make small announcements (that the buffet is open; that it’s toasting time, with introduction of each toast; and introduction of the couple’s First Dance, the Father-Daughter Dance and Mother-Son Dance; and finally, that the couple is preparing to depart) and sufficiently tech-savvy to stop and start the music at the right times, sometimes a D.J. might just seem like too “clublike” at a brunch reception. Many venues have a sound system already set up, and if not, iPods or laptops and speakers work just fine, and most groups of Groomsmen can be counted on to bring the equipment/speakers and set it up. If nobody has a microphone, do make the effort to rent one. The happy couple should work together uploading music to be played:
• music to be played during arrival of guests (enough music for half an hour beforehand-just start it half an hour ahead of the ceremony)–probably light classical or instrumentals of popular songs, segueing directly into. . .
• . . . selections for the ceremony itself–specifically, bridesmaids’ processional; the bride’s entrance and processional (music will be stopped here for the ceremony); and then the recessional music–or, if you are lucky, you’ll have a friend or relative who is accomplished on the piano, who wouldn’t mind providing this music for you.
• music to be played during the meal–about 40-45 minutes’ worth of music while your guests visit your elegant buffet, eat and visit (music will be stopped here for the toasts)
• specific selections for the First Dance, Father-Daughter Dance, and Mother-Son Dance, or any other specific dances, such as the “Money Dance”
• about 1 hour’s worth of some fun/some romantic dance music for your guests to enjoy as you do a walk-through of the dining tables, greeting family and friends and alternately joining in the dancing. Since this is a daytime event, especially if your guest will include a sizeable number of children, it’s happy and lively to throw in a “Hokie Pokey” here or a Conga Line there–simple enough for the children to join in.
For additional music tips/information, see:
http://factoidz.com/how-to-get-the-music-for-your-wedding-for-next-to-nothing/
http://factoidz.com/weddings-your-best-dance-style-for-your-first-dance/
http://factoidz.com/non-sappy-father-daughter-dance-songs-for-your-wedding/
Photography: Whether you’re economizing with a less-commercial wedding photographer or have decided this is the one area where you want to splurge for your city’s best-known, a brunchtime service and reception will save you money. Why? Photographers (particularly of the high-end variety) charge a set rate for “X” number of hours (intentionally set to just not quite cover the whole event), so that you’re forced to extend the time at a high hourly fee for full coverage of a late-day wedding extending into evening. A brunch is generally do-able within the time constraints given.
Food: You can save big here, not serving a dinner. Go with an elegant and bountiful buffet. I provide some suggestions if your wedding help group–moms, aunts, friends–are doing your own catering. Use some, all, or ideas of your own family favorites (or, if you plan on a caterer, they will surely be able to advise you on a lovely brunch variety at much less than “dinner” prices):
Menu Suggestions:
Fruit skewers (colorful chunks of fresh melons and strawberries on bamboo skewers rising like a flower arrangement from a face-down half of
a watermelon–dramatic!)
Vol au vent –elegant and somewhat pricey, this sherry-sauced chicken dish would be the “showpiece” dish of your buffet. Ask your
grocery store manager to special-order the frozen puff-pastry shells (only 6 to each pack!) from the manufacturer at a “case”
price. Multiply up from this recipe times 17 (the recipe serves 6, allowing one per person since it will be a buffet, with other
foods served) by 17 for 100 adult guests (not many kids will want it):
http://recipes.recipeland.com/recipe/v/Chicken_Vol-Au-Vents_39500
Breakfast casserole (browned hash browns and chopped onion, bacon bits, scrambled egg, grated cheddar cheese–mixed & baked, then
topped with additional grated cheese just before serving)
Spiral-sliced ham (leave it stacked up around bone but be sure meat is loose or almost-free from bone for ease of serving)
Crab or salmon quiche (use canned–appropriately seasoned, it won’t taste like it) and asparagus/mozzarella quiche (so there
are two choices, but nothing with bacon if you are serving the breakfast casserole or ham–too much of the same taste.
Added benefit: asparagus/mozzarella quiche makes a vegetarian entree option–be sure to mark it as such
A plate or pretty basket of croissants, with commercially-whipped butter on the side (so much more soft and spreadable than patties on
ice). You might be tempted to provide a selection of breakfast pastries–but remember, you are very shortly going to be serving
wedding cake. If most guests have just had a pastry (or a muffin, which is even more cakelike), they’ll most likely pass on
having cake–and how party-poopy is that?
More ideas for large-group dishes and portions: www.angelfire.com/bc/incredible/indexhundred.html
Beverage suggestions:
Punch Bowl: Mimosas or Pomegranate Mimosas
2nd Punch Bowl: Non-alcoholic punch (something non-staining is best as children will be served here–White Grape Juice mixed with
7-up or Sprite). Added benefit: this punch is adult enough for grownups who prefer no alcohol.
Pitchers: Screwdrivers and/or Bloody Mary’s
Toasting Time: Poured champagne for adult guests; offer sparkling cider for children or adults who prefer it
Coffee service table: Standard service, with regular and decaf; add tea if there are enough among your guests who would prefer it; sugar and
cream and the option of an artificial sweetener (Splenda™ is most popular just now).OR, consider splurging on a . . .
Portable Latte Bar –with the lesser expense and toned-down “extravaganza” ambience of a brunch, it would be a fun and impressive
choice to hire a portable latte bar–make sure they have at least 2-3 servers, or the long lines will kill the fun.
Currently popular themes that lend themselves well to brunches:
“Tiffany”-themed weddings are currently very popular, and the light aqua-blue color is a natural for daytime: a scattering of faux diamonds and aquamarines sparkle on white tablecloths with aqua-blue napkins, with a stack of 3 assorted-sized “Tiffany boxes” (use any boxes, covered with the “Tiffany” blue wrap, tied together with white ribbon and topped with a few white silk florals as centerpieces. (The wrap is available at: http://www.sophiesfavors.com/giftwrap_aquabluegiftwrap.html ) The legendary movie title Breakfast at Tiffany’s makes it a natural for a fun-but-elegant brunch!
What says “good morning” like a cup of coffee? A coffee theme is another shoo-in for a brunch-time wedding. While brown mixed with pastels and taupe mixed with brights are very “in” color themes that would lend themselves well to a coffee theme, you can really use a completely unrelated color scheme, and still pull it together with coffee-themed ideas: large, clear-glass vases with a taller pillar candle in your wedding color, the bottom few inches buried in coffee beans as your centerpieces. Aromatic! Heart-shaped coffee measures as favors (they’ll think of your wedding every morning when they make coffee), or small fancy boxes of chocolate-covered espresso beans. There are small, coffee-scented, cup-and-saucer-shaped candle favors to be personalized with tags printed with your names and wedding date; or single servings of coffee in packets touting the two of you as “the perfect blend.” This would obviously be THE theme where you would want to give greatest consideration to a latte bar. If that’s not in the budget, however, add a bit of luxe to your regular coffee service table by adding 2 or 3 bottles of flavored syrups (sugar-free if possible)–vanilla, almond, and chocolate are the most popular, and provide a generous pitcher of half-and-half so that people can make their own lattes.
So before you veto all possibility of a wedding brunch, stop to think about all of its great possibilities. You could afford the venue you really want and still have an elegant, unique and memorable wedding unlike anybody else’s. AND, still have time to make the plane!
05.05.09
