"What?" "You’re homeschooling?" "Doesn’t your child miss the opportunity to do things normal children do, like riding the school bus?"
Questions like these can haunt homeschooling parents who have struggled with making the best educational choices for their children. Every possible scenario goes through the mind of a parent deciding to homeschool for the first time - "Am I making the right choice?" "Are all those people right about my child missing social opportunities?" And, yes - The thoughts that our children are somehow missing out by not riding the school bus may enter our minds as well. But, if you ask many - possibly most - homeschooling parents, you will find that among their top 10 reasons to homeschool, if not number 1, is the fear of traumatizing the child by so-called seemingly innocuous social activities such as riding a school bus. This decision may come from their own childhood experiences. Because of this some parents even choose private education where they are driving or carpooling their child. Even some parents of public-schooled children choose to drive their children back and forth to and from school.
The school bus - That big, bright yellow object of transportation that Kindergartners are pumped up about with the start of each new school year. There are books about school buses, programs about school buses and even special presentations about school bus safety & how fun a bus can be. When your child watches wonderful teaching programs such as The Magic School Bus, they see the school bus portrayed as a fun-loving mode of transportation that’s part of a normal school day. What they don’t see is what many homeschooling parents hope their children can avoid as part of their childhood - The bullying that takes place in so-called "social" settings such as a school bus. The following video will show just one of so many examples of what can go on aboard the school bus. This one occurred recently in Belleville, Illinois:
This incident brings to mind a movie that was shown to public school children in the 1970’s. It was called Cipher in the Snow. It is a story of a little boy who, one day got off the school bus & fell face-down, dead in the snow. No one cared. While the school bus was not the entire cause of his death, the experience certainly contributed as it was all part of his existence where nobody cared.
While severe beatings and extreme neglect as portrayed in theses video clips may not happen every day, there is certainly a constant awareness of social status among bus riders. On some buses, the "cool" kids ride in the back while if you are unfortunate enough to be the last bus stop picked up for the day, you may end up all the way in the front where the so-called "geeks" sit and get labeled as such. These are all what well-meaning friends and family members may say are a part of normal childhood. How else will a child learn how to handle social situations if you do not allow them to partake in them? This is their question.
The answer is that homeschooling families do not typically isolate their children from social activities. They just monitor and choose which activities they deem appropriate for their children. Most homeschooling families do not see the need to "throw their baby into the ocean full of sharks in an effort to teach them to swim." Parent may view situations like school bus "socialization" as just that.
While opponents of homeschooling will continue to portray homeschoolers as backward, socially unfit, out-of-touch, strange people; homeschoolers know that typically in reality the homeschooled child tends to be completely well-adjusted socially, maintains a good sense of self confidence & can typically carry on a conversation with an adult then turn around and play appropriately with a 2 year old. This type of mature, healthy behavior came from caring adults who nurtured them through their childhood and did not merely throw them to the wolves as a social experiment to see who comes out alive.
If it truly bothers you that your child will never ride a big yellow school bus, buy or make one out of cardboard. Or, purchase a school bus tent your child can pretend play with. Or, on occasion, there are community safety days offered where modes of transportation are on display to be toured. Feel free to take part in these activities and enjoy the fun of "riding" a bus without all the hassles.
