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How to Cope With The Death of a Loved One

by Sara Valor, Staff Writer

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Life they say is just what we make it. Life is never really a bowl of cherries or a bed of roses either, no matter how hard we may try. Life hands us some pretty good times that we often cherish forever and sometimes life deals us some really bad cards. However, when all is said and done, living our lives here on earth is really just a learning adventure and a great big playground for us to gain particular experiences.

We are born; we grow from either a girl into a woman or a boy into a man. We go to school and learn as much as we can and then hopefully satisfy our need for gainful employment. Some of us find our true love, marry, and then go about our lives filling it with children or pets depending upon our personal leanings.

We often deal with births with joy and happiness when somewhere we are told we should weep and we deal with death with sadness and remorse when somewhere we are told we should actually rejoice.

Have you ever wondered what that is all about? I have wondered about it myself and I think that in a way it does make sense. I believe that our spirits are eternal and that we were who we are in spirit form before ever coming to this earth to experience having a body and the wonders of being human. I may be a strange one, but I also believe that we make a choice of who we are and what we will become before we ever get here. I believe we choose our advantages and disadvantages as a person. I believe that we choose our families as well as whom we love outside our immediate family.

I think that the reason we are told we should mourn a birth and rejoice a death has a lot more to do with life in a bigger perspective than what we can see if for while we are here in the land of the living, meaning our humanness. Birth is in a sense a type of dying or transition to coming to earth and experiencing all its joy and pain. Death as we know it is simply a birth or transition to another part of our life, perhaps one of the parts we forgot about as we passed through the veil from our pre-existence lifetime to the one we enjoy now. The experience of living in a mortal body is part of the test we must undertake to excel further than we even realize.

These things I feel and believe they have been a great help to me while dealing with the death of a loved one. You see, I feel we knew each other before we were ever born here on earth and I believe that eventually we will meet up again in another life. Death is just as much a part of living as birth seems to be.

Sure, it is sad and disappointing to lose someone we love dearly, but it is all really part of a grander plan. Perhaps, it is a plan that in human form we may not be perfectly sure of understanding. In this lifetime we will always miss those who have gone on before us, however there must be work for our loved ones to attend to in the next life. For some, the wear and tear on a human body gets to be more than they can bear, for some no matter how healthy they may be their body or spirit is tired and ready to go “Home“.

It is normal for humans to mourn the death of someone they love dearly. Mourning is in someway a tribute to those who have passed on. However, maybe we should really consider what our loved ones would want us to do rather than sit in a depressed state and mourn their loss.

Perhaps we should take great solace in knowing that they are no longer experiencing the pains and ills that come along with living. We will always miss them, however perhaps they are now spending time with other loved ones who has gone on before them. I believe this is true, that the people that have already past are waiting and watching for the rest of us so we can all gather together and party at another meeting one in a higher and better place than this world we live in as human beings.

I actually believe a lot more things than all of this, and it could fill a book; however, my point is that although we miss and mourn those we love when they die, we will see them again. I also believe they watch over us and out for us at times. If you are dealing with the death of a loved one, make sure you take the time to reminisce over all the good times as well as look forward to the time when you are united with those who have passed the veil to a better place. I think by doing so, it makes them feel better about the whole situation as well.

Blessings!

© 2009 Sara Valor

About Sara Valor
Sara Valor has been reading and writing privately for many years and now she wants to share with you and the rest of the world!
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Comments & Questions
Ram Swaroop Bhavanasi  Staff Writer - 76 Factoids | + 232 votes

Its a real misery to miss the loved one and one will take some time to get out of that pain and agony. Perhaps one should understand the life and death cycle so that he/she can easily counsel them selves and gradually come out of such situations.
posted 8 months ago
Sara Valor  Staff Writer - 216 Factoids | + 863 votes

Yes, the missing of them goes on for years, it never really stops and sometimes missing them can catch you by surprise many years later. I simply smile through the tears and speak to them, telling them I miss them and love them. I believe at those times they are nearer than you realize and they are missing you and loving you just as much as you do them.
posted 8 months ago
Cheril Goodrich  Factoidz Writer - 19 Factoids | + 48 votes

My son made his transition in 2001. There are certain events we can change in our lives, and those we cannot. This was one of those events that could not be changed. Even at this, there were ways he let me know he was still around. A song we listened to would suddenly play when I thought about him. Every year, for as long as the plant I had from his funeral lived, it bloomed around the time of his transition. He related to me in dreams he was not dead, but still alive. The same is true of a sister I lost in 1973. There is no death. When we are forced to accept what is not real, we are denying our spiritual truth. The body dies, yes, but not consciousness or the spirit. The spirit was created under Living Law, written in the Book of Life, and therefore not subject to death. Good article, thanks for sharing.
posted 3 months ago
Glynis Smy  Factoidz Writer - 6 Factoids | + 33 votes

I have lost so many in my life, I live mine to the full. Many were under 50yrs old and made me realise how precious life is. I often smell cigarette smoke and know one of my brother in laws has visited, if the dog begs to no one, I know it is my best friend. I smell lilly of the valley and know my gran is near, when a plant flowers and has never done before, I know my grandfather has had a hand in it. I could go on. Interesting article, thought provoking.
posted 3 weeks ago
Sara Valor  Staff Writer - 216 Factoids | + 863 votes

Hi Cheril & Glynis, I'm thankful that my rendition of How to Cope With The Death of a Loved One has been so touching for you. Blessings!
posted 3 weeks ago
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