Reactions by Katydad
We can learn reactions from scratch or emptiness with a new beginning. This word is extremely significant because it tells a story of weakness, passiveness, and of unknown innocent ignorance. It shows how important “leaned reactions” really are and why.
Brandi’s family was dysfunctional everyday. After a knock down drag-out fight the night before, the next day a family barbeque would take place for show. Nevertheless, the neighbors must have known from all the racket, but the ironic facade took place to save face. A glorified event of love and affection, spewed all over the backyard. The children fell for the pretense and felt an unfamiliar love that they pined for daily.
This story goes back to Brandi’s childhood were she learned at a tender young age not to provoke or make waves. Rather to submit was her mother’s way. Mary, her mother displays this as reactions to life and obstacles that crossed her path.
“Don’t fight, don’t argue, don’t make waves, just let him have his way, unemotionally Mary said.” Of course, she was speaking about Brandi’s father. “He is always right and never wrong, it is just easier to agree,” her mother would chant continuously. It does not matter who is right or wrong the key is to survive the day.
She didn’t know what to do. With Brandi’s hand in tow, Mary pulled Brandi around the block praying her rosary aloud which was her stagnant, yet endearing, solution. “Come along, come along, we need to walk; we must walk and pray for help.” In those days, few organizations would help a lost soul like Mary with four children. She learned never to go against your husband, stay with him always no matter what the cost. Mary was a cook who worked 16 hours a day. Her husband, Fred, worked but drank his pay. Yes, she was strong on her feet, but weak inside, and feared doing it on her own. She must stay. There was no other way.
Brandi learned the “CORRECT REACTION is NO REACTION”, just pretend you don’t exist, this to will pass.
Excruciatingly engraved into this child’s brain, “The best reaction is no reaction and it will get you through each moment of the day.”
This did work for several teary-eyed years and Brandi became a shattered shell of a person.
She grew up despite her parents. In her twenties, she had ulcers. Nevertheless, that was before her inevitable nervous breakdown that amazed the mind-mending doctor and did not happen until her thirties. Her task was unthinkable, a task beyond belief! She relearned her reactions and had to reevaluate her values, principals, and goals in life. Brandi realized she was gloriously saved and reborn, in a way, to embrace each day and help others.
