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How To Get Rid of Roaches like a Redneck

by Sara Valor, Staff Writer

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I can imagine that somewhere there may be someone who adores roaches or cockroaches. They may enjoy their favorite roach they call Billybob or even Sallysue. That’s fine and dandy for them. However, there are some others, which cannot stand the thought of them, much less having any around.

Do you ever wonder how many types of roaches there are? Google it to find out just how many then maybe let the rest of us know it by writing a factoidz of your own. However, the palmetto bug is native I do believe, way down south as one of the most common type of bug we call roaches. Next, there are German roaches, they hitched a ride on a ship no doubt and then there is another type I am not sure of, although I think they are Asian roaches; however, each of them belongs outside.

“Outside“, spoken by the voice talents of Ashton Kutcher or @asplunk on twitter - twitter.com/aplusk - Elliot the deer in Open Season a children’s cartoon, which by the way is an excellent animated children’s movie.

Roaches have been wandering around eating, making waste and breeding since who really knows when and studies predict that they are bound to wander around long after humans finally exterminate themselves to death. Like any other type of wildlife creature, they should be outside as far as most folks are concerned.

This is why so many individuals are so interested in pest extermination. This is why I have decided to let out a secret family recipe for getting rid of roaches, so listen up. Here you will learn the green living redneck secret to getting rid of roaches and cockroaches. First, you need to gather your ingredients. The recipe for Redneck Roach Rid includes:

- Flour

- Bowl

- Onion

- Boric Acid

- Sharp Knife or Whopper-Chopper

- Something to Stir with or Use Your Hands

- Paper Towels, Napkins, or just the Cabinet Top

Chop up onion using the sharp knife. Alternately you can cut, chop and puree in the Whopper-Chopper, which in our family is lovingly called “Aunt Viola“ one of my great-aunts, since she was the only one in our family back then who could stand to cut up an onion and not worry for the shedding of tears. This was her job; she loved cutting and dicing for recipes.

In the bowl you will pour a handful of boric acid and two handfuls of flour, use what you have, the roaches don’t care whether you use plain or self-rising flour. Stir dry mixture together until blended. Next, you will pour in the cut, chopped or pureed onion into the dry mixture in the bowl. Stir this mixture thoroughly until blended.

After blending the Redneck Roach Rid, it will be in the form of dough. Pinch off meatball or smaller balls size and then roll into balls. Place the rolled Redneck Roach Rid balls onto the napkins, paper towel or just the cabinet top, according to your preferences as well as using what you have. Allow the balls to dry.

You can now place these balls in strategic and well-known places that roaches travel through. Knowing them, this could be just about anywhere. However, place the balls and then let them alone. The scent of the mixture will draw the roaches’ attention and they will eat of it heartily. Soon you will need to clean up the roach carcasses.

Success is yours, you now know how to get rid of cockroaches and roaches like a Redneck!

Note: If you are allergic to onions, flour or boric acid, it is not recommendable that you try this recipe and thank you for reading.

Note: This is a healthy recipe that will work well for those who are suffering the afflictions of pests such as roaches. For many allergy suffers, the use of chemical based spray pest killer can and will cause sever reactions. This can be avoided by using this rustic, green living, old homemade secret family recipe to get rid of roaches and cockroaches.

By the way, if you wonder about how to wash a cat like a redneck, you can find out right here.

* To Ashton Kutcher - No offence mentioning you in the same article with Redneck Roach Rid or roaches and cockroaches, man. I love your work, think you rock and wish you the best!  See ya "outside"… By the way, I’m still trying to reach the numbers in your twitter challenge. Everyone Follow Me! :D

** To all you Rednecks out there, pass it on!

© 2009 Sara Valor

About Sara Valor
Sara Valor has been reading and writing privately for many years and now she wants to share with you and the rest of the world!
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Comments & Questions
3lilangels  Staff Writer - 57 Factoids | + 195 votes

This was great, loved the humor in this yet very informative thanks!
posted 7 months ago
Sara Valor  Staff Writer - 216 Factoids | + 862 votes

Thank you 3lilangels! I'm thrilled you enjoyed the article. I enjoyed writing it and sharing it with ya'll! :)
posted 7 months ago
Rae  Factoidz Writer - 20 Factoids | + 96 votes

This is great, I hope I never have to use this advice, but just in case this is great information.
posted 7 months ago
Sara Valor  Staff Writer - 216 Factoids | + 862 votes

I hear ya Rae! Glad you enjoyed the article.
posted 7 months ago
mary marlowe  Factoidz Writer - 14 Factoids | + 55 votes

What a great tip! The humor was terrific as so the receipe. I dhope I too never have to use it, but its a great article to pass along.
posted 7 months ago
Sara Valor  Staff Writer - 216 Factoids | + 862 votes

Thanks Mary, I'm glad you enjoyed it, feel free to pass it on!
posted 7 months ago
   - 2 Factoids | + 10 votes

Great info!
posted 5 months ago
thestickman  Staff Writer - 99 Factoids | + 377 votes

HA! Loved this supercilious romp of redneck rowdiness! It Rox! And yeah, a neighbor here in our building brought home a 'secondhand furniture' and dammit, -he brought roaches with it! We've had apartments evacuated & sprayed (several times now) and we STILL see the odd-occasional interloper running around here. GAWD I hate roaches. Roaches, -and our neighbor for bringing them into our building!! Going to try your solution yessirree! -thestickman
posted 5 months ago
Sara Valor  Staff Writer - 216 Factoids | + 862 votes

Ha! Thanks Stickman, I know how ya feel, my sis brought at least a dozen crews or herds with her and I'm still fighting the battle, from now on, she can wash clothes, Outside!
posted 4 months ago
   - 4 Factoids | + 30 votes

As a Southerner---not a redneck one, lol..I can tell you there is nothing more revolting than roaches in your home. I am so lucky I have never had much of a problem with them..Ants are a big issue in the south too. Thank you for sharing this real interesting anti roach recipe..great idea!!
posted 4 months ago
Sara Valor  Staff Writer - 216 Factoids | + 862 votes

Thanks Dawn, I'm glad you enjoyed how to get rid of roaches like a redneck!
posted 3 months ago
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Published 7 months ago
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