How to give a great massage

I am all about getting a massage, but when it comes to giving, well, guilty as charged: I have always been stingy. But, sometimes you have to put aside your selfish nature, grow an attention span, and become a giver rather than a taker. Here are some helpful tips on making it a positive experience for both you and your partner.

1. Make sure your hands are in tip-top shape. Wash them, do your best to make sure they are smooth and that your nails are trimmed. Who wants to be massaged by the same hands you ate your chicken wings with? Not me, that’s for sure. Another conscientious move is to warm your hands up before making contact with the person’s skin.
2. Stop talking. Or, if you must blather on, then do it in a soothing voice. Stick to pointed questions, like where they would like to be massaged, what pressure. You are trying to relax them and remove them from the day to day stresses. This is not the time to inquire whether they remembered to pick up eggs and milk, or tell them about how much you hate your boss.
3. Set the mood. It might seem totally cheesy to light some candles, put on some relaxing music and go full pull, but small tricks really do wonders. If you’ve decided you’re going to give your partner a luxurious experience, you may as well pull out all of the stops and make it an event to remember. Maybe even draw a bath with bubbles for them to lounge in while you set up, getting them prepared for an ultimately relaxing experience.
4. Use a delicious scented oil or lotion. Smell is one of our most powerful senses. Maximize this, and appeal to it while you massage your partner.
5. Mind your tempo; be slow and focus. An amateur massage move is to chop wildly until you feel you’ve put in your time. Be languorous and relaxed while you massage your partner. Pay attention to the details of their back, feet, wherever you may be massaging. Take your time, your partner will notice if you are trying to rush. Ask them what pressure they prefer, and adjust accordingly. I have no attention span, get bored easily, and I have a tactic that helps me get through this. I focus on my partner, thinking of all the good things about him and good times that we have had together.

By bringing out all the stops to make this a superior experience for your partner, you are guaranteed to make them feel happy, relaxed, and above all, appreciated. Who knows? Maybe they’ll be so inspired they offer one in return.