I think it is safe to say that we’ve all had a crush in our lives at one time. How often does a crush become reality? I think it probably happens more often than not. When you first start being attracted to a date, isn’t that a crush initially? Or just great chemistry? What separates the two? Many times “A Crush” is kept secret due to the fact that it could be someone off limits, like your sister’s boyfriend, or your best friend’s husband!
If it is a feasible situation, how can you take this fantasy romance to a real life situation? We are all scared to death of rejection, so what do we do to get this party started? Before you get up the courage to ask out this "Crush", ask yourself why you have a crush on them? Is there any reality in the two of you actually being a couple, or do you just want one incredible night having wild sex, like I do with George Clooney?
If there is a chance that a crush could go somewhere, you absolutely must leave the shyness at the back door and go knock on the front! Don’t let fear kill the prospect of something that could be an amazing situation. Even if they say NO to your advancement, it is better to make the attempt than to spend the next 30 years wondering what could have been. How many times have you heard people talk about the crush that got away? Grab some balls and go for it. (We are referring to both sexes by the way.)
To reduce your fear in asking them out, remember that everyone likes a little flattery. You will never be regarded as a bad person for taking the plunge; they will be flattered, even if you are not their type. What do you have to lose? Men and women spend half their waking day letting their EGO rule their lives. You may think they have a big ego and that is why you got rejected, but it is actually your ego that took the fall.
Not everyone is for everyone and we have to acknowledge that. We all have different tastes. Chemistry is everything and if it isn’t there, move on without anger or hurt. It can’t be forced and it is nobody’s fault. The pheromones are just not circulating. If they reject you in a nasty way, then you have the inside scoop as to how they really are, and thank God you saw them in action before you invested anymore time on them.
Be careful that your Crush doesn’t become an obsession. If this person starts to become your every thought, you keep trying to run into them or you are driving by their place to see what they are doing, you have a big problem. When you alter your own life and change your behaviour just to see them walk by, or if this crush/obsession gets in the way of your career, family and friends, you are in way too deep. That where the term stalker comes from. Does your Crush even know who you are? Make sure you know the difference between fantasy and reality.
Many times “Crushes” happen due to unhappiness or restlessness in your love-life. We all fantasize over what we are missing in our relationships. Our crush is usually someone who is completely different to what we already have or seems to add a missing component. It gives us a new purpose, and makes us feel warm and fuzzy. It takes us away temporarily. When we jeopardize our relationship for a short fling, is when fantasy becomes dangerous. Learn how to separate a mental escape from a physical one. Make sure it is worth it, as it may end up costing you much more that you thought . . . .
