The “First Dance” as husband and wife is a tradition that has been passed down for many years; a tradition that many couples embrace. Learning to dance can be intimidating, but it does have to be. However, there are many options available to you:
· videos, DVDs and Cds can be borrowed from the library or purchased online
· you can learn steps online- http://www.dancingfordessert.com/ (basic steps)
· a friend or family member could teach you or
· you could take wedding dance lessons
“Dancing with the Stars” has made Ballroom Dancing popular. With this insurgence, more and more couples are making their “First Dance” as husband and wife special. They are no longer satisfied with just rocking from side to side. Dance lessons can be expensive but with a little planning you can easily overcome this challenge. If you cannot afford the lessons, perhaps someone could purchase them for you as a gift. I worked in a dance studio for several years and was amazed how often dance was given as a gift.
As you plan for your wedding, discuss your “First Dance” as husband and wife. Some questions you may ask are:
- Do we want to include the “First Dance” as a part of our wedding day? If the answer is yes, make it a priority add it to your to-do- list and as an expense- along with the floral arrangements, wedding cake, wedding dress, etc.
- What do we want it to look like? Do we want to just dance and get it over or do we want to WOW our family and friends with something special?
- Do we need to learn how to dance from a professional instructor or can we learn some dance steps online?
- What mood do we want to create -romantic, traditional or elegant?
The tips below will help ensure a simple, stress-free, elegant or romantic “First Dance”:
Ø Consider getting professional dance instruction. Seeking professional dance instruction can build confidence, grace and help create a stronger partnership as you move as one. Check the Yellow pages or internet for local studios or independent instructors who offer private lessons and group classes. You, the couple are the center of attention during the “First Dance”. Private instruction is the most beneficial. Private instruction lends itself to one-on-one instruction which means that you can spend as much time as needed to learn your routine.
Ø Start taking lessons as soon as possible. It is recommended that a couple begin taking lessons between 3-6 months before the wedding. This will compensate for any lessons that may be missed due to unforeseen emergencies. It will take at least 4-5 dance sessions before you become comfortable with your “First Dance” routine.
Ø Choose your special song or music early. The Waltz is traditionally the first dance for the bride and groom. Today, you can still embrace the “First Dance” tradition with any style of dance you desire. When selecting music or a song choose something that holds a special meaning for both of you. As you are selecting your special song, listen to the lyrics. Are they appropriate for the occasion and general audience? A dance instructor can help you with this if you need assistance. Additionally, they can choreograph a routine for you with dips turns, etc.
Ø Before selecting a style of dance (Rumba, Waltz, etc) consider the style of your wedding dress. Does it have a full skirt or is it A- line? A full-skirt will look elegant for a Waltz or Foxtrot but will not look as fabulous with a romantic dance such as the Rumba.
The “First Dance” should last 2 ½ -3 minutes. Have fun with it.
Ø Choose an instructor that has experience working with bridal couples. This decision will prove invaluable. An instructor with this experience can assist you in selecting the best dance for your music/song, plan your entrance, choreograph your routine, etc.
Many guys are hesitant about taking lessons, therefore, you want an instructor who is sensitive to this and who will make learning to dance fun and easy.
Ø Wear the shoes that you are planning to wear for the “First Dance”. If you are concerned about soiling your shoes, wear a pair that is comparable. I suggest you wear something that is comparable to your wedding dress for a least one session. It sounds silly, but wedding dresses can be heavier than what we are accustomed to wearing for special occasions. You want to be able to move with elegance and ease.
Ø Dance for your marriage and not your wedding. The dance skills that you acquire during your “First Dance” instruction will last a lifetime. Many couples find it difficult to spend time together because of their busy schedules and use dance as one of the solutions to this problem. One wife exclaimed, “This is our weekly date night”, when asked why they were continuing their dance lessons.
Learn a variety of dances and you will never be bored at activities that include dancing as a part of the festivities.
Ø Buy only the lessons you need. If you are planning to take lessons only for your wedding, state your goal. Many studios offer special dance packages. How many lessons you purchase will depend on your budget, dance experience and your dance goal.
Generally, it takes between 10-15 dance sessions to learn the steps, feel confident and look graceful performing a dance routine.
Ø Plan to take a lesson during the week of your wedding. You will be busy during this time. Dancing is a great stress reliever. If you purchased a wedding package, save a lesson for the week of the wedding. A quick refresher of your routine will work wonders for you. If you have used all of the lessons in the package and feel you need a refresher session, ask about taking a single lesson. Some studios will allow you to purchase a single session. You’ll probably pay more for a single session. However, if you purchased a package they may be willing to charge you the same rate per session as the package rate. ASK!
As a student of Ballroom Dance, my advice to anyone taking wedding dance lessons, just have fun with it. Something else to remember: ladies, in dance the gentlemen lead and the ladies follow.
