Not only did I date somebody I met on-line, I married him too.
Would I recommend an on-line dating site? NO!
I met my husband on-line but not on a dating site.
In my opinion on-line dating sites are too predatory. Both people know the other is “looking” and available, in some cases this also means “vulnerable”. Women, in on-line dating sites, and particularly those who are older, may be targets for men looking for women who have insecurity issues and could easily be manipulated. There are many stories of women, perhaps newly divorced, or never wed, who become swept off their feet and soon find themselves surrendering their money to their new love.
For men looking for these women to prey upon, the on-line dating site may be ideal hunting grounds.
I, myself, was not looking for a relationship. I found myself becoming a regular in a chat room for a television show I enjoyed. The chat room offered no place to post pictures of ourselves, as such nobody was judged, either positively, or negatively, for their appearance. We could share as much, or as little, about ourselves at any time. As regulars we broke down walls and became friends. People who probably never would have hung out together in real life, made genuine friendships in the chat room, separated only by distance.
The chat room was ideal for me. I shone. I had been running my own business and had lots of spare time to be in the chat room. It was fairly easy to see who was real and who was just playing. My personality, wit, and quirky sense of humor came out in the chat room, and I met somebody there who had an equally quirky sense. I was not even looking for a relationship.
Through this kind of meeting, one can then share e-mails if they feel comfortable. Later people can share pictures, and exchange phone numbers.
Tips:
- Do not make it clear you are looking for a relationship.
- Ideally do not be there solely for the purpose of finding a partner, be there for interpersonal relationships of all kinds, friends and passing time. If you feel desperate for a dating relationship, you have issues to heal first before you should be looking anywhere for a relationship.
- Be a regular, take notes.
- Do not expect things overnight. My relationship took over a year.
- Do not be to trusting.
- When you find somebody you like, or find somebody likes you, keep the relationship out of the chat room. There are many people who frequent chat rooms and enjoy messing up relationships as though it were some kind of game, people who lurk for the purpose of causing drama.
- If you do decide to meet in person, do so on a turf that is safe for the woman.
- Dating on-line can be tricky and dangerous, I find some dangers can be removed by being in a site not designed for dating, but where random friendships can be formed.
- If your dating is to be long distance (my husband to be was in the states, I was in Canada) get a long distance phone plan.
For the Record
After chatting with the man whom I am now married to for over 1 year in the chat room, we dated long distance (via telephone) for a few months, then we met in person. He sold his home and moved here to Canada. We have since moved to a larger property. At the current time we have been married for just over five years.
