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Its Time for Parents to Start Parenting Again

by Nikkia Nicholson, Member

Parenting, Kids & Family > Parenting
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How many children must fall victim to gun violence at the hands of another child before society comes to the realization that the root cause of this evil is a result of bad parenting and the lack of family values?

I’m asking this question with a heavy heart, you can’t turn on a local or national news program or radio station nor can we open a newspaper or log on the Internet without reading or hearing how another young life has been tragically cut short by a weapon that was invented to fight wars. Our homes, neighborhoods and schools are not battlefields so therefore should not be treated as such. Now if you’re the parent of a child who has committed or taken part in one or more of these heinous acts YOU HAVE FAILED MISERABLY AT YOUR JOB! Long gone are the days of hopscotch, jump rope, swinging on the monkey bars, climbing the jungle gym at the neighborhood park, riding a bicycle or going to an institution of learning without feeling the need to look over your shoulder. Attempting to conduct any of these activities can now cost a child their life. When did the killing of innocent youngsters become such an epidemic in our country? We can’t go back in time and pinpoint one particular incident that would give us a definitive answer. There’s several factors that have lead us to the brink of this destruction with BAD PARENTING being at the top of the list. Having a child myself I understand we can become overwhelmed at times, but that is not a good enough reason for us not properly paving the way for our children to live long happy fulfilling lives. Before we decide to make ourselves responsible for another human life outside of our own, we must take into consideration the amount of time, patience and diligence we’ll be needing to effectively handle our obligation for the next 18 years. Community leaders are preaching and marching the streets of crime infested neighborhoods talking about stopping the violence and working together as a community to make it safe for our children. How can we expect the community to come together when the families of these delinquents are so dysfunctional that they can’t or won’t take care of their own flesh and blood? What good would come from community organization if everyone who shares the same zip code were not on the same page? None that I can see. If you’re going to scream the message of unity in the streets I say march to the homes of the children who are committing these horrific crimes and find out what is, was and is still going on in their home environment that has contributed to them becoming felons. We have an unrelenting duty as parents to send our children out into the world as compassionate, responsible, productive members of society who value their lives as well as the lives of others.

It sickens me to know that some of us parents may be forced to deal with the unimaginable grief of having to bury a child who was not blessed to experience another tomorrow. It also scares me to think how this could happen to any one of us at any time. There was once the notion that this kind of violence only happened in poverty stricken low-income inner city neighborhoods. We now know this to be completely false. African American and Hispanic American youths are shooting each other to death in their own homes, on street corners and just about anywhere they may go to hang out over a case of mistaken identity, wearing a certain color, being seen in the wrong neighborhood or because someone has taken a  facial expression the wrong way. While Caucasian and Asian American youths are taking an even more extreme approach in this pandemic by committing or plotting mass murders in public schools and on college campuses because they can no longer take being teased and bullied or because they come from a well to do family that has given them everything and they’re bored with their life and are looking for something to do. If your son or daughter is currently being charged with such a crime this shows that you have not been paying attention to your child or taken a real interest in their life. We can no longer sit around believing these things only happen to other people. No one is immune to this madness. Have we forgotten that life is a precious gift from GOD that should be cherished and lived to the fullest everyday? It would seem so when you take a minute to observe the festering cesspool that has formed around us. Is it really that difficult to teach our children how to solve problematic issues with another child like mature decent human beings? I don’t think so. I’m standing on the shoulders of two women who were able to instill the difference between right and wrong in their children. My grandmother did it alone with eight and my mother did with three after she left my father when I was eight years old and we’ve all turned out okay. Being a single parent, having multiple children, working more than one job, going to school or not having a lot of money can no longer be used as excuses for why so many of our children and young adults are turning to violent crime to deal with their inner demons. As we all can see when parenthood is taken lightly it only leads to pain and suffering for the families of the victims who will never get to see another day. A family does not necessarily require a married mother and father working together as one unit. That would be ideal, but it’s just not and may never be a reality for many of us. With that being said, if you find yourself in any of these situations you should use that as the ultimate motivation for wanting the best life possible for your child. If you’re a parent whose truly gone to great lengths such as sending your child to boot camp, jail, reform school or you’ve sent them away to live with other relatives hoping they can help you make a difference in your child’s behavior and nothing  seems to have worked then you are not on my "bad parenting" list. This is a case of that child having to want a better life for themselves. You’ve done all you know how to do. You can’t help can’t help those who won’t help themselves.

To sum it all up I know some of you who have taken the time to read this article may not fully agree with me and that’s fine. Everyone has the God given right to express how they feel. This is just one frustrated mother’s opinion on why gun violence is so rampant with our children in today’s society. Parenting isn’t for everyone and we have a mountain of gravesides to stand on for this statement to reign true. 

  

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Comments & Questions
Keep them coming. Every parent and grandparent needs to hear what you have to say.
posted 12 months ago
wonderful article and well expressed.
posted 12 months ago
Thank you so much for the support!!!
posted 12 months ago
thank you for such a powerful message as this one, keep on writing!
posted 12 months ago
I see my typo and it's bugging the heck outta me!!!
posted 12 months ago
Great job in raising the awareness of parents and their responsibilities.
posted 12 months ago
Hi Nikki, I was sent her by ehow and This is the first factoidz I have commented on. I enjoyed reading your article. You need a picture up. I know it is harder to get them up on here than it is ehow. Again great article. Alot of truthful information all parents need to hear.
posted 12 months ago
Hey its me again. I see the picture, I don't know why I didn't see it the first time. I went back to it to check it out again. Teresa
posted 12 months ago
Nikkia: I had all ready commented on this article. I think it is very welled expressed and written
posted 11 months ago
Very good article! Parents need to parent! If you know where your kids are, who they are with, and what they are doing, you will not likely have to deal with the issues you're talking about in this article! I have an article on Family Safety Awareness that fits nicely with this topic - it takes hearing this message over and over and over until parents re-claim their right to lead, guide, guard, and direct their families! Let the children be children until they must grow up for the years of childhood are short indeed. Thank you for this great article!
posted 11 months ago
Ray  Member

Hey Nikka, Parents need to protect their kids in this sick society and also bear responsibility for them also. I agree with you 100%, With the recent murder in Eastpointe, Michigan of Matthew Landry. If you don't know about this killing, He was just going to the Quizznos Sub Shop at 2pm in the Afternoon when he was assaulted and taken to an abandoned house and murdered. This senseless violence has to be stopped. I say we need a victims rights law in tribute to channon christian and christopher newsome. Christian and Newsome Law. One thing is parents certainly should be responsible for their children, But there has to be stricter laws like the Bible says an eye for an eye. If you don't know this Channon Christian was gangraped, murdered, torturted and stuffed in a garbage bag to die, she was only 21. By 4 Males and 1 Female. But the victims were censored in court. Here is what one person had to say in the comment section on Wbir.com covering Lemaricus Davidson 7 day trial, By the way he got first degree murder, premediated murder and will be convicted. But the death penalty is too good for this monster. This is the comment: GeorgeW wrote: I hope every judge and every attorney in this area reads these posts. Hell no, victims have no rights. They haven't had for years. In this particular case, the "defense attorneys" are trying to make it Chris and Channon's "fault" because they may have smoked a bit of pot. BFD! I have said it before, and I will say it again, take these animals back out to Chipman Street and fire up the incinerator! Personally, I am currently involved in two situations where my Mother and I are the victims, yet the ones that never repaid close to $6,000.00 in loans to us are so far getting all the rights. Not for long though. 10/28/2009 7:12 AM EDT on WBIR.com Yeah, in the trial , Lemaricus Davidson was not allowed to give prior convictions, like carjacking, robbing a pizza hut. Why? This monster needs to let the jury what his prior convictions are and were. Do you allow this to happen or do the victims need rights. I think victims need rights. Channon Christian father Gary was not allowed to testify. Why not? No victims Rights. Lemaricus Davidson interrogation was censorsed on video from prior convictions. Why not? No victims rights. If you believe victims need rights and criminals have to disclose prior convictions. Christopher Newsom had smoked pot, but does that give these defense attorneys the right to bring this up in a trial of gangraping Christopher and burning his body and shooting him three times. Certainly not. Here are a couple of links if you don't know about The Channon Christian and Christopher Newsome Murders in Jan 6-7 2007. Wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murders_of_Channon_Christian_and_Christopher_Newsom Here is the link of Live Wbir this morning on Thursday October29, the jury is going to deliberate on the Death Sentence. Today. Thursday. http://www.wbir.com/video/breakingvideo.aspx Feel Free To Leave A Comment On My Blog, http://martialartsandnutrition.weebly.com/my-blog.html Take care, Ray
posted 11 months ago
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