Keepers, Life’s Rules
Submitted by: Katydad
Keepers equal Life’s rules, family values; the rules inside parents can unlock inner beasts when trying to decipher what is right. Terminal turmoil stretches and thrashes the internal rules, organs, and emotional defining decisions must emerge in gut-wrenching situations. Who decides the values; the ones held deep beneath the surface, for these are the keepers.
Depending on what values ruled your parent’s life, adding unforgettable past experiences you embraced, the spotlight turns on you. The values you decide to keep now forcibly engraved into your children’s souls.
Children watch mom and dad’s actions. As thought-provoking lessons, they become priceless auto-visual repays of keepsakes. Willpower prevails to take or leave them, to inscribe them with invisible ink, to store these values in our descendants’ minds; the combination unlocked instantly to a specific incident when reflecting back to youthful years.
Do married and single parent’s values differ? Couples have to confront each other’s soulful rules and compromises result in the final values they want to bestow on their children. The struggle begins if both disagree on the values they will set. It’s very hard to change a value; particularly, if you believe it to be an undeniable truth you cannot live without. You don’t just change it without a fight because these inner laws led you through every step of your life. If your spouse stands fast to hers, then a compromise produces the new values set in stone. Following not just preaching them is crucial, together holding true and leading by example.
Single parents face other barriers, forced to parent solo. The marriage ended; the court finally made them agree, to disagree. Maybe they never agreed upon setting their values, and eventually it set them both free. With children involved, the control game proceeds, now the children’s divided set of values reside at two different houses. Confused which set to use when, not wanting either parent to be upset with them. “Do as I say. I don’t care what they tell you at your other house.” Not realizing what we are doing and how intimidating this sounds we say this loud and clear.
What a dilemma for our youth in need. “It would be better if they could just agree for me,” her inner voice echoes with hope.
Divorced singles contend with the values of the absent, sometimes irritated spouse. Constant culvert schemes, vengeful acts, and deceptive plotting all plays a part in the children’s interpretation of family standards to keep. How can they possibly sort this out? The principles displayed by their parents may become the values, but the children, not the parents, pick the keepers. If they see lying, deceiving, and cheating is sometimes acceptable, children assume it is completely acceptable. This applies to all values children decide to keep.
Thinking out repercussions before acting out unacceptable values in your mind may make you hesitate. Realize your actions! Our children minds store the value keepers your actions taught them, engraved with gold into their souls.
Sources:
“The Eleven Principles,” Character Education Partnership, 1025 Connecticut Avenue NW, Suite 1011, Washington, DC 20036, (800) 988=8081, © 2005 CEP, http://www.character.org/site/c.gwKUJhNYJrF/b.993263/k.72EC/The_Eleven_Principles.htm, (28, Mar. 2006).
“Parenting without Arguing” PC Parenting Software,
http://www.encouragesoftware.com/parentingclick1.htm?gclid=CN7xzr6ciIQCFS84CwodygpCgA, (28, Mar. 2006)
