Women are confronted almost on a minute-by minute basis with ads telling us what we should do to be more beautiful, sexier, and more desirable. If we only buy this product, try that diet, use that piece of exercise equipment, we’ll stand out from the crowd, be noticed, be happy, and have our every wish come true. If only life were so simplistic! Therefore, the biggest beauty mistake any woman can make is falling for the promises lurking under the pretty pictures of the beautiful people!
To be truly beautiful, we must be who we truly are, first and foremost. All the makeup, styling products, diets, and exercise equipment in the world will not make us any more beautiful if we don’t know who we are. There is nothing more enticing than a confident woman, strong in the knowledge of who she is. She may not have the beauty we see pictured in ads, but there is an aura about her that compels others to take notice. She may be the woman who, when she enters a room, draws all eyes to her; but she is just as likely to be the mom who lives across the street, the kindergarten teacher, or the silver-haired clerk at the grocery store as she is to be a Fortune 500 executive. Her beauty comes from within. And without such beauty, a woman is only a shadow of herself.
I have certainly been persuaded to try this makeup and that clothing brand, to use this styling product and that exercise regimen several times in my life.
Now, I realize all I’ve done is spend money on superficial enhancements that often do not add anything to the package. Does that mean that we should be dowdy or frumpy, that we should walk around in our robes all day long because none of the superficial stuff matters? Certainly not. I wear makeup and color my hair. I have my hair styled on a regular basis. I try to buy clothing that is flattering. I use perfume. I watch what I eat (although not as much as I should) and exercise (again not as much as I should). But I’ve learned that I’m never going to be Audrey Hepburn, Grace Kelly, Jennifer Aniston, Angelie Jolie, a super model, or any of the other icons of beauty we have created through the ages. I am most comfortable, and, according to those who I care about, most beautiful when I am unaware of my looks, when I’m taking care of my family, helping in the community, taking care of business.
For inspiration as to what can add to our beauty, consider the virtuous woman described in Proverbs 31: 10-31. This picture of the ideal woman (wife, mother, friend, companion) illustrates what we have discovered time and time again: It is not what we look like, but who we are and what we do that define each of us. Her outward continence is not really discussed, except that she wears good clothing. She is intelligent, fair, firm, and strong yet gentle. She runs her household smoothly, taking care of her family. She is productive and knows how to conduct business. She is generous. She is admired by both her family and people in the community. Yet there is no indication that she really is concerned about what others think. She knows who she is and does not need the approval of others.
Today’s woman leads as complex a life as the virtuous woman did centuries ago. The culture has changed, the technology has changed, and the fashions and styles have changed. What hasn’t changed is that beautiful women are still doing the same kinds of things. We learn and grow. We take care of our homes and our families. We work productively, both at home and in business. We don’t concern ourselves with what others think because we know who we are and do what is right. We bring honor to ourselves and to our families. We are respected.
Does that mean we don’t take care of ourselves physically? Of course not, I’m not suggesting we wear no makeup or never color our hair, just that we remember that those are all exterior features. They don’t enhance much if, when someone gets past the exterior, the interior is empty or cold. We’re all seen the scene in movies and television shows where the young teenaged girl, trying to be someone she isn’t, puts on gobs of makeup and dresses inappropriately. Then someone - Mom, Dad, an older female friend - takes her by the hand, leads her to the bathroom, and washes her face, all the while explaining that all that stuff isn’t beauty. And the young girl, along with the audience, realizes the wisdom of those words. Perhaps we all need to think about the gobs of stuff and inappropriate clothing we mask ourselves in and instead of trying to figure out what needs fixing, we should begin to discover what is right and good about us. What are we meant to do in this world? How can we do it to the best of our God-given abilities? How can we learn and grow in truth so that our inner beauty shines through. For that beauty is far more important and potent than all the moisturizing lipstick in the world!.
