There has been a lot written about this one subject because it seems it is everywhere anymore. There can be signs that your spouse is having an affair but more goes into it than just some suspicious signs.
Just remember, these are signs to look for, not to suddenly start accusing, you also have to pay attention to patterns.
The most common signs your spouse is having an affair.
- Starting to come home late from work and this is unusual.
- Taking much longer than usual to do simple errands at the store.
- Shutting off the screen or closing the currently open window on the computer the second you walk in the room.
- Be very secretive about their cell phone calls and texts, like talking or texting while in the bathroom often.
- Change in habits such as what clothes they wear when going out, for example it is odd that a wife would get dressed up to go to the grocery store if that isn’t her normal pattern.
- Having to take a shower or bath as soon as they get home from work or errands, if this isn’t their normal pattern.
- Talking about someone new at work and then suddenly not mentioning them anymore.
- Coming home smelling of alcohol and denying it or calling you crazy.
- Working a lot of overtime yet the paychecks aren’t showing this.
- Not at work when you call, of course this can vary depending on the job, are they normally there when you call them.
What to do when you see these signs.
These signs are not written in stone, you also have to know your spouse and if these signs are sudden changes that aren’t part of their normal pattern, then it is time to start paying attention. Use your gut feelings, what are they telling you.
Your gut feelings can be more perceptive then you think they are. Just don’t be overly suspicious about this because that can be very damaging. Use your common sense and your past experiences with your spouse.
If you ask your spouse if something is up or something you can think of to ask do so without being accusatory about it, does your spouse seem to blow up and get much more overly defensive then is their normal attitude.
Paying attention and do you snoop around ?
If you really are suspicious out of the blue, one of the things you can do is to snoop, that is up to you. If your spouse isn’t having an affair of any kind, then it can be seen as an invasion of their privacy, how many secrets should there be between a man and a wife is up to the individual relationship.
What is snooping, well it is looking at their cell phone texts and called and received numbers. Do you see any you don’t recognize. Are there more texts than normal and especially to one person. Are there texts at odd times of the day or night. Check your own home phones caller ID box for unusual numbers. You could also install a keylogger on the computer.
Also look over the credit card bills, anything unusual there.
With so many spouses working now and going to meetings and overnight business trips its hard to not think about this once and a while. Just be sure you really have reasons to be suspicious or you could be making your life miserable for no reason.
If you should find anything that does point to an affair, don’t accuse your spouse yet, don’t show them what you found or they will lie out of it making you feel foolish and wrong for ever suspecting and snooping.
Also, by asking them or showing them this or that proof, your spouse will know how you found it and if they are really having an affair, they will change their tactics, making it that much harder for you to actually find out.
