Your fiancé is being pretty patient with all the planning and choice-making and girlie stuff that surrounds the preparation for a wedding–realistically, he hasn’t been able to have an in-depth talk with you about dirt-biking or football in months, and I know how you must miss that.
So why not give him something of his own at the wedding–that the guests will be talking about for months to come. You could turn the idea over to him completely to implement, or you can spring it on him as a surprise at the wedding: a Cigar Bar! It sounds so classic and elegant, it’s trendy but unusual, and the men will love it. Your groom will love it–chances are pretty good that none of his friends got to have a Cigar Bar.
Now, don’t just dismiss the thought because you don’t smoke–few people except connoisseurs do anything more with cigars than pose with them and puff smoke anyway (a Cigar Bar is much more about the concept than about the smoking). And don’t think it would be too expensive (it’s a whole aspect of your wedding that can be completely done for $100 - $150)–it’s mostly just a small slot of time for the men to go outside (and believe me, the single women will certainly trail along) for some informal chatter while older and/or non-interested guests get some quiet time to visit while (important bonus!) giving your food team a chance to buss away the dinner dishes before it’s time to serve the cake.
When to have it: after dinner, when the toasts have ended and your next move would ordinarily be to cut the cake, simply have your D.J. or Master of Ceremonies proclaim that “The Groom would like to announce that the Cigar Bar will now be open for the next half-hour for anyone who would like to join him there, prior to the cutting of the cake.” (Note: you’ll say half an hour, but allow 45 minutes in your planning–and it can be hard to break up this group, so at that half-hour point, have bridesmaids and groomsmen ready to start warning guests to wrap it up, and start herding them back to the reception room.).
Have the Cigar Bar area set up except for the cigars, so the guests who see it beforehand will understand that it’s not “open” until it’s announced. The Best Man or groomsmen can bring the cigars as they lead the way when the announcement is made, and set them in the center of the table.
What you’ll need:
• a designated area. Does your venue have a gazebo or other covered outdoor area? No? Then keep your eye open at discount stores (Wal-Mart, K-Mart, Big Lots, Rite-Aid, etc.) for small (10’ X 10’) canopy tents that the groomsmen could easily put up for you during wedding set-up time. You should be able to pick one up for $25-$30. Or if you’re renting dishes, lines, or other items from a rental company, you can probably add one to your order from there; you just need to take a look outside your venue and pick a spot for set-up.
• a table–doesn’t have to be fancy and you don’t want it too large. A card table, either square or round, is just about right. Someone you know has one.
• tablecloth–pick up a round or rectangular (and cut it down to size) plastic tablecloth at the party store in a color that coordinates with your wedding colors. It will just look classier with a tablecovering, but if a hot ash gets dropped, you’d rather have it melt an inexpensive plastic one than have a nice linen cloth ruined. Take several 5-inch lengths of masking tape, fold them over and stick to the table top, flatten out and stick the plastic “cloth” to the table to keep it in place.
• CIGARS. Check online–just Google “cigars.” We have found that Thompson has quality cigars, even in its lower-priced cigars. Size matters: as soon as anyone says the word “cigar,” a picture is formed of a fat stogie. You don’t have to know a lot about cigars to know not to go there, for two reasons: (1) fat cigars burn hot and harsh (they’re not for amateurs), drop a lot more ash, and (2) fat cigars are for occasions when there are several hours to enjoy them–and this isn’t it. So you will want to go with a small-gauge, more of a “cigarillo”-diameter (size of a dime) cigar for this occasion.
How many? For a guest list of 100-120, about 50 should be plenty. For 200, about 75, etc. Any leftovers make nice additional “masculine favors” for dads, grandfathers, uncles. etc.
• cigar display. If you really want to make an impression, a wooden humidor in the center of the table will do it–it doesn’t have to be a large one. If you know someone who has one, they might lend it to you for the occasion, or you can pick up a nice-looking-but-not-state-of-the-art humidor on eBay (search for “cigar humidor”) for under $50–and it would make a nice memory box for your wedding mementoes afterwards (given as a bride’s gift to her groom, it could have an engraved brass plate, “to John from Sally on Our Wedding Day”). BUT YOU DON’T HAVE TO HAVE ONE! (read on)
If you purchase cigars in boxes, the boxes can make their own fun, colorful display. If the cigars you select don’t come in boxes, stop by a smokeshop/tobacco shop in your area and ask if you might purchase 2 or 3 empty cigar boxes.
Check the family-and-wedding-party inventory of crystal or silver serving dishes or platters, and stack the cigars in those.
• cigar cutters. At least two, on opposite sides of the cigar table. These can be purchased on eBay (search for “cigar accessories” or “cigar cutters”) or are available at a local smokeshop.
• lighters. About four, scattered on the table. No need to be fancy here–a handful of Bics will do just fine.
• ashtrays/disposal. Dollar Tree has cut-glass ashtrays with 2 or 3 openings large enough for small cigars for–well, a dollar. Place one or two of these on the table, and the table should look very well-stocked, with the cigars, lighters, cutters and ashtrays.
• safety. Make this the responsibility of the Best Man or one of the groomsmen: Buy 2 plastic buckets at a dollar or discount store, in an unobtrusive color. Fill buckets halfway with rocks, then fill ¾ full with playground sand, and set just outside opposing points of the “bar” area (for example, opposite poles for a canopy tent). If you have (or can borrow) a kitchen (or other) fire extinguisher, place it under the table. If no fire extinguisher, buy a 3rd plastic bucket, fill it with water, and place it under the table. Make sure the Best Man or designated groomsman understands that he is the “Fire Marshal” for the Cigar Bar and knows where the buckets of sand and fire extinguisher/water is placed. EXTRA NOTE: having this plan in place should also reassure a venue manager who may otherwise have safety concerns.
• Nice extras:
• for a touch of class and great photo-ops, order a printed wedding banner and have it personalized not with your names but with the words “Cigar Bar”–this link to an example is available Oriental Trading Company, http://www.orientaltrading.com/ui/browse/processRequest.do?demandPrefix=12&sku=47/458&prodCatId=384446&mode=Browsing&erec=7&No=0&sp=true&Ntk=all&Ntx=mode%2bmatchallpartial&N=384446&tabId=1&requestURI=processProductsCatalog&sd=Personalized+Wedding+Banner
• Put a speaker nearby so the reception music can continue be heard in the Cigar Bar.
• If you have additional tables to put out, you might add one or two just inside a tent post or at the edge of the Cigar Bar area, and put an additional ashtray on each.
• Personalize your cigars with home-made cigar-bands with your names and wedding date printed in a fancy font in a coordinating wedding color; cut to size, fun one end over a glue stick and affix around the cigar. (So as not to reduce their “cigarish” charm, you might want to leave on the original branding band, and put your personalized one just above or below it.)
• For guests who don’t smoke but want to be part of the fun, provide candy-store chocolate cigars (expensive, so only provide about 10-12); or if there will be children who tag along, bubble-gum cigars (less expensive, but harder to find–look online). These may come with “cigar bands” that read “It’s a Boy/Girl”–but these can be replaced by your personalized wedding cigar bands.
The unexpectedness of a Cigar Bar and the conviviality it brings to your celebration, is huge in comparison to the relatively small (in wedding terms) dollar outlay. It gives the Groom a portion of the reception that he “owns,” and will help to make your wedding more memorable. And put the photographer on notice–because a shot of the groom and his father/grandfather/brother sharing a celebratory cigar will be priceless.
04.07.09
