When we meet, get married and have children, we feel we have fulfilled the all-American dream, with our own home, the white picket fence and, of course, a dog, cat, bird and more. Of course, things do not always have the happily-ever-after scenario, and we do come to terms with the reality that we can no longer live together.
Divorces do get matters resolved in an amiable way as far as the property and material things are concerned. Hopefully for the sake of the children, the couple will do what is best for them and remain as cordial-type friends as possible, as it is very damaging for those who admire and look up to us the most, seeing their “idols” fighting all the time. This can work out for the best of all involved . . . but what do we do with the loving family pets? These are, after all, living creatures, which loved and respected the whole family unit. Do we not think that divorce and/or separation has no effect on them? It is my personal opinion that they are not part of the “property or material” values that get divided like a piece of furniture. Most pets do have feelings and, though they may not know what is really going on, they know something is happening!
When the family was a unit, who cared for the pets, and what was their role in everyone’s life? In our situation we had one older dog, larger and 2 smaller, younger dogs. My thoughts were first, not to uproot the older dog out of that house as she never knew any other way of life. As much as I would miss her (and still do after all these years of her being gone from all of us) it was in her best interest to stay where she was and I knew she would still be well cared for.
I was moving where only small pets were allowed so it did work out to move the two little guys in with me. You have to weigh all the options of where you are going, what is the best environment for your pets, as a family, who took care of the pets, will they still be well cared for if they go with you or would they feel better with your ex-spouse. There is a lot to consider when there is a separation. We can not only do what we want and feel when others well beings are involved. Just be sure that the pets are going to be well cared for, whether they stay with one of you or are divided among you. They, along with the children involved, are going to need you to go the extra mile to make things as “normal” as possible . . . . And the love, pour on the love and attention in expressing that everything will be O.K., nothing that happened is because of any of them and that they are still number one with you–both of you. This is always a difficult time for all and the adults in this once family unit have to do what is best for all of those that depend on you and look up to you. They need and love you.
